Two Smiling Dogs!

A Day of Fun at the Hamden's Most Elegant Shop for Pets!
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Another Day of Fund Raising!

"Not another fund raiser for the dog park!" growled Clarence. He had just come through the gate when Helen had rushed out to meet him. and tell him the news. "We just had a fund raiser last October! Henri and I were forced to wear those ridiculous dog costumes! We were supposed to be wiener dogs, of all things!"
Helen shook her head. "The breed of dog you are referring to is Dachshund, not wiener dog. And if your tail hadn't poked out through the rear of the costume, you might not have had that little run around the park!"
"That wasn't a "little run around the park", Helen," I hissed. "That was two old tom cats fleeing for their lives. And Ashley, that miserable mutt, was leading the entire pack!"
Helen purred. "But it was all for a good cause, Henri. After all, the dog park is supported by donations. It takes a bit of change to keep the pooches in "poop bags", you know. So I cooked up a few cakes and our person is going to drive you and the cakes over to the Parkway Plaze where my contribution shall be displayed and sold atThe Two Smiling Dogs, which is a wonderful establishment devoted to all kinds of things for us cats and dogs."
"So all the money they get from the sales goes to purchase plastic bags for dog excretions? Is there any reason why they can't use a little box like everyone else?" I meowed.
Helen glared at me. "For one thing, it would take an enormous amount of litter to fill a large number of boxes. And who would have to go out there and clean the litter boxes? They would force us cats to do it! And frankly, Henri, I have better things to do with my days when I am not taking a nap!"
Clarence and I suited up as Dachshunds. I replaced the batteries in my camera. My person opened the back door of his automobile. Clarence and I jumped in. The door was closed, the engine started and slowly, we made our way out of the driveway. We were headed toward the Parkway Plaza and a day of greeting dogs and people and hopefully, selling enough cakes and cookies to cover the cost of a case of "doggie bags". And yes, I took some pictures.
Some really strange looking dogs came to the store and their people bought them all kinds of stuff. Of course it was stuff only a dog would appreciate. Did you know that us cats don't have a sweet tooth? Dogs love gooey, sweet things but not us cats. Give us a bag of catnip any day.
Clarence checked out some of the cat toys. He thought they were very nice and made notes about which items he liked. I suspect his person will find the list on his desk one of these days. I meowed to my person that there was a certain thing I liked and he bought it for me. I was very grateful. I may even share it with Sidney, although it will probably take him a few days to figure out what to do with it. Stella, another of my housemates, knew what it was for and has been jumping and leaping around like a gymnast in a world class competiton!

Well, Clarence and I did meet some interesting mutts who came into the store. One was a white pooch who was really into politics. I think he was running for some office within the dog world. He spent most of the time barking to other dogs about his agenda. I had no idea that dogs hold elections and that sort of thing. In the cat world, you decide on your agenda with a good, knock down, fur flying, ear biting, rumble in the alley.
Clarence was mesmerized by a black and white dog who came into the store wearing a pair of goggles. "I need them," he barked, "when I go for a ride in my person's automobile. I like to hang my head out of the window and watch the scenery and make out with other dogs who might be passing by. By the way, my name is Oliver."
Later Clarence approached me and whispered in my ear. "Better not let Ashley see those pictures you took of the dogs! She'll be driving everyone batty until she gets a pair of those spiffy goggles. I wouldn't mind having a pair for myself...All the queens in the neighborhood would find me irresistable, don't you think?
Carefully, I sniffed Clarence from head to toe. "No," I meowed. "It would take more than a pair of goggles to make you irresistable."
Clarence grabbed the top of my costume and pulled. "I knew I could always depend on you to bolster my confidence!"
"I don't want you to be disappointed, that's all," I meowed, adjusting the hood which covered my head. At that moment, my worst fears surfaced. Oliver walked over to us and stared at us both for a few seconds. "You know something, doggies? You smell like cats!"
Clarence shrugged his shoulders, wrinkling the fabric of his disguise. "Well, Oliver, the truth is that we both live in a houseful of cats. The smell sometimes rubs off on us. Isn't that true, Henri?"
"Happens all the time," replied. "Tell me, Oliver, do you know of any store that sells something that would get rid of the cat smell?"
The dog shook his head. "Never heard of nothing like that. Cat smell ain't a bad spell. It just makes me want to chase you two guys all over the store," he barked, grinning at us.
"Oh, you wouldn't want to do that!" growled Clarence. "Maybe we can do that at the dog park. That's what the dog park is all about. Dogs chasing dogs. Right?"
"Guess so," said Oliver. "Got to go now and have some more humans make a big fuss over me and my goggles. See you around."
I had begun to feel uncomfortable with all the dogs coming and going. Their persons were buying all kinds of treats for them and as long as they did, the dogs paid no attention to us. I took my photographs and tried to stay out of harm's way. Eventually the bake sale, fundraiser was over and it was time to pack up and return home. I noticed a white smear on Clarence's costume, near the mouth. "I thought I should take a nibble of the carrot cake which Helen baked." Frankly, I don't care for carrot cake. I would have preferred a nice pudding or catnip flavored biscuit.
It was a short drive home and I was anxious, as was Clarence, to shed our doggie costumes. We smoothed our fur and brushed our whiskers. "I'm glad that's over," meowed my companion. "I really don't understand why we cats have to support the dog park."
"Well, let's put it this way. The dog park provides a safe place for dogs to run and play and make fools of themselves. And in a household which has both dogs and cats, it gives us kitties a little piece and quiet. At least for an hour or so," I told him.
Helen was waiting for us when we walked in the door to the kitchen. Her eyes sparkled with anticipation. Her fur was fluffed around her face. "Well," she purred. "How was the bake sale? Did you sell all of my cakes my cakes?"
"We sold most of them," Clarence said. "I took a nibble from the carrot cake. I found it a little dry." Clarence ducked but not quickly enough to dodge Helen's swift right paw which was directed at his left ear. "You'd think by now I would have learned to watch my meows around that cat," he whimpered, rubbing the left side of his face.
I patted him on the head. "How about we round up Rumsfeld and Carlyle and head for the Dumpster for dinner! On Sunday they usually have pot roast with gravy!"
"I hear you, Henri!" And we were off to an evening of fine dining!

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